Psychologist Dr. Georgina Ramirez – “How Can I Stop Feeling Like Both Of My Children’s Fathers Used Me Just To Have Kids?”

QUESTION: I have been through a lot at my young age. I have two kids from two different fathers. The first one always denied my son. After he was a year old, I started a new relationship and got pregnant again. However, that guy left me to be with other women. He came back but the lies continued. I feel like these two guys used me only to have kids. What can I do so I don’t feel like this?

DR. RAMIREZ’ ADVICE: Hi. It is normal to feel angry and perhaps even resentful when we feel used or betrayed. Your feelings are important and I believe it’s crucial to learn from this experience so you don’t place yourself in the same situation again.

Having a child is a decision one must make by themselves and not allow others to persuade or pressure them. As you can see, having a child to care and provide for is a great responsibility and a lifetime commitment, which is even more difficult to do as a single parent.

I would recommend individual counseling to strengthen and empower yourself. This will also help in appropriately dealing with your feelings and choosing healthier relationships with responsible men in your life. There is no loss if we learn from it. Stay strong.

I hope this is helpful. Take care.

Dr. Georgina Ramirez


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