Here’s the story thus far. I met my son’s father when I was 20. He was just shy of being 24 and still living with his parents. I couldn’t complain about it, though, because I was living with my parents, too. Well, obviously there is no need to explain in detail what happened. We had a child and split up.
Now fast forward to today, well, actually about 7 months ago. I was out running errands and didn’t realize that I forgot my son’s car seat in my car. While I was out, my son’s father had come to get him, and waited for me to get back so he could use the car seat. When I got back I told him to avoid this happening again in the future he needed to get his own car seat for our son. He blatantly told me he would like to but didn’t exactly have the funds for it at the moment. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I do remember reading somewhere that the non-custodial parent needs to have all the things necessary for the child to be taken care of, i.e. a bed, clothes, a car seat, etc. I told him that it wasn’t about whether or not he had the funds, it was about the safety of his child. He then went into this whole rant about how I’m not doing anything with my life. How I need to stop living at my parents house, get a job and pay my own bills. Well, first off (just to explain), I pay my own bills with the unemployment I get. Second, I am going to school. And third, my mother has made it very clear that she would rather make sure my son has everything he needs by living with her, as opposed to me struggling to make ends meet and not giving my son everything he needs. Now I do know that government assistance could help me but my mother told me that I shouldn’t take it away from someone who might truly need it because they have no family to help them out (as I do).
What I seriously have a hard time grasping is this. Did this man, who lived with his parents ’til he was 24 without any kids to support, seriously just lecture me on how I should live my life? Granted he did buy a car seat the very next week, but I have never endured so many comments about how little I’m doing with my life. This coming from a man who has nothing other than a high school diploma. It’s almost like I’m supposed to be better than him. I’m seriously considering telling him that if being a father is such a burden to him, he can sign over his parental rights.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to bring up this subject with him without him having a complete melt down?