"A Man's Response To Women Who Are On Dating Sites Just For Friends"

This blog was e-mailed to us from a guy in response to the comments made surrounding Cuni’s newest blog entitled: “Dating Site Don’t – Ladies, I’m Talking To You!

Hi. My girlfriend is a fan of SoLatina and she talks to me about it all the time. Today she called me from work and told me to go to the site and read one of the blogs that was about dating sites. I met my girlfriend (of one year) on Match.com so we both get a kick out of reading things about the positive and negative aspects of dating sites. So she e-mailed me the link and I told her I’d read it. As soon as I started reading the blog I knew exactly why my girlfriend wanted me to see it. It touched upon something that I used to complain about all the time before I met her: Girls who are on dating sites but aren’t looking to date.

Before I met my current girl, I had been on dating sites for about a year or so. Prior to that I was meeting girls through my friends, at clubs or even in the streets. But I wasn’t meeting the type of girls I liked. So my cousin suggested that I try a dating site. She found her fiance on eHarmony and thought that I might be able to find someone nice, too. I decided to try eHarmony for a month but didn’t like it. It was crazy expensive. So I decided to put up profiles on Match.com and a site called Plenty Of Fish (which was a free site). I had no idea what to expect since it was my first time doing anything like this. What I found, though, is exactly what the girl who wrote the blog said! There were sooooo many profiles where girls said they were just looking for buddies or friends; that they had no interest in going out on dates or meeting someone. I was like “WTF? Why am I on here then?” Are we in Kindergarten here, where it’s “cool” to make new buddies in your mid- to late- 20’s? Match.com and Plenty Of Fish are dating sites…”dating” being the key word here!!

To me it’s pretty pitiful that 25- and 30-year-old girls were on these sites looking for new friends. I was on these sites to date and I assumed that the girls who were on these sites were there to date, too. I mean, so many girls in their profiles said things along the lines of “I’m just here to check out what this site is all about and make new friends. I’m not looking to meet anyone right now…” Are you friggin’ serious? You might as well go to MySpace if you want to make friends…or friendster…or Hi5. It just seemed so silly to me that someone would pay money to join Match.com and only be looking for friends. I guess some of these girls didn’t mind paying for friendship. As for me, I was on these sites to meet someone, date them and if everything went well, start a relationship. Of course, I’m sure there were plenty of guys on there who just wanted sex. Just as there were girls on these sites that just wanted sex, too. But if a girl thinks that even one single guy on these dating sites are on them just to make friends and have platonic conversation, then they’re in either a total fog or just plain stupid.

I met my current girlfriend on Match.com and we were both there for the same reason: to find someone special. We used to joke about this all the time. So when she called me today and told me to check out this girl’s blog, I knew I’d get a few laughs. But that girl Cuni is right. Ladies…if you’re only looking for new friends and platonic relationships, go to the local library or an abstinence party. Don’t waste guys’ time because I’m sure you wouldn’t want them wasting your time.

-Ricky R., Richmond, CA

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